- C.A.L.D. - Tuesday, July 31, 2007

The main reason for this entry is because I'm troubled and I need some insights..

I've met this guy and we dated quite a few times and every single moment spent with him is just priceless. He said he loves me and I can see he's doing everything to prove it but I got this fear inside me that don't want to deal with love again. I am traumatized because of what happened in the past. I have invested all of me yet I didn't get the same respect I deserve. This time, he promised he's not going to be like that and I'm not sure if I should trust him or any men again. He is so good to be true and I'm thinking that I will be stupid enough to let him pass my life but I am so uncertain about my feelings..

I even told him I love him.. My heart says it but other parts of me don't. There's uncertainty and I hate it. I know I'm being unfair but what am I suppose to do?! Well I know the answer and that is to be true to myself but.... I cant even explain it.. Maybe I just love the attention.. Damn, I'm mean!

Anyhow, I just needed to vent out.. I hope he feels better by tom..

- cream... - Monday, July 16, 2007

First and Last

It was a bright humble day

Where leaves touch the ground

Seems everything is out to stay

Hark thy melodic sound

I saw haze as you verge upon

Paused and consoled my presence

You were sublime from a span

Defined miracle in all its essence

I glimmered to see if it’s not a dream

I was stunned with what I saw

First time I felt to have a tight seam

Though perfection is dead by flaw

We talked, laughed and feasted

Cannot help but feel bliss untouched

Tomorrow perceived and painted

Relentless glee felt so much

We looked in each other’s eyes

Trembling inside, I close mine

Warm inside, but out felt like an ice

Lips are one, perfect are thine

It was that time we said goodbye

That seemed everything felt just

It was exquisitely divine

Troubled, it may also be the last.


- shit load! -

It's been awhile since my last post.. I just didn't have the time to contemplate on my life this past months.. It has been a whirlwind of misadventures for me but hey, I'm still here..

A lot of people has been added to my life and yeah some of em has been completely forgotten also.. They really do come and go..

I've overcame the most painful break up I've ever been to.. It was hard but heck I don't have time to whine over a person who don't deserve me.. I know what you're thinking (if u know me that well).. shit I know right.. Here I fuckin go again!!! Well I've been going on dates.. so far I'm just enjoying it and taking my time.. I don't want to end up with the wrong guy again..

So yeah, Ill be in Texas in 2 days.. I'm thinking if I should move there or not..... I've been everywhere this past 4 months.. I've been to Florida, Georgia, Alabama, Tennessee, North Carolina, yada yada yada... Im planning on going to either California or Virginia next month but we'll see...

I guess that's it for now.. I'll just be more elaborative next time.. teehee..

*I like somebody now.. It feels like high school all over again..

ABOUT ME

Im Keren (que-ren) Keziah (que-z-yah).. 22 years of age.. BSCS graduate.. PINAY ..true blue thomasian.. loves dancing.. I love myself.. hopeless romantic..single but occupied.. miss home so much.. orange is my color.. I love fashion..

BEAUTIFUL ME


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